Reverence is the
Fountain of Respect
"Thou shalt not make unto thee any graven image, or any likeness of any thing that is in heaven above, or that is in the earth beneath, or that is in the water under the earth." Ex. 20:4
Two- Every Goal to God
The fifth commandment can be summed up in one word: Honor.
"Honor thy father and mother."
This commandment is the first with promise and the first step which describes our
relationship with the society of men. Psychologists are not too far from the truth when they seek to trace
many of a troubled person's problems back to their relationship with their parents. If a person gets
off to a bad start here, it is very difficult for him to get in step with others. For those who have
violated the fifth commandment, the only hope of true recovery is in mastering the first. None of us can
keep the law in its pristine, perfection. The law was never meant to be a medicine as much as a mirror.
The ministry of the law is to show us the perfection of God and the imperfection of ourselves.
When it has done its' intended work, it is not broken, but it is we who are broken. The fifth
commandment has broken many a heart, when that heart realizes that it has first broken it.
This commandment belongs with all the others. The ten commandments, or as the Jew calls them, the "ten words," must be taken as a whole. They come as one. James rightly insists that to keep all and break just one is to break all. Salvation is not in the law but in the Lord.
Nevertheless, having said all that, the ten commandments are beautiful indeed. The fifth is
as glorious as the others. In the first four commands, God touches me; in the last six I touch
the world; or better said, God touches the world through me. The importance of this fifth
commandment, is found in the word "father." If anyone wants to know what God is like, let
him forge his theology in this fire. God is like a father. What a sacred, high and holy calling
is that of parenthood. How tragic and distorted the image becomes when marred by
abortion, infanticide, incest, divorce, and abuse. However twisted sin has made the offender, the
office is still a precious one. Children are instructed by nature as well as Sinai to honor their
father and mother. No matter how poorly a parent has filled that position they still deserve honor.
Perhaps "honor" is too classical a word? Perhaps we should use the common or more
vernacular word of "respect." Respect is the oil that lubricates the machinery of civil society,
and it begins at home. Respect for people, feelings, rights, and property is nurtured in the nursery.
Respect is a rarity today. Once man trampled openly on the first commandment it was
impossible for him to keep the others. Once a man becomes disrespectful to God there is no hope
he will truly respect his neighbor's rights, person, or property.
The child who is not taught to honor or respect his parents will never properly respect the other authorities in his life. It is little wonder that in a society where God's authority is ridiculed women abort their offspring. It is little wonder that in a society where parents abort their babies with little pain of conscience that the surviving generation is cynical and irreverent.
The curriculum of kindness begins with this admonition to honor one's parents. There are many good reasons to give honor to parents regardless of their success in living up to the highness of their calling. The first is that they have given us life. We owe them honor and respect because in a sense they have made us, and not we ourselves. It is utter arrogance for the pot to chide, or criticize the potter. Some vessels are of honor and some of dishonor, some of precious and others of baser material, but no matter the shape, color or circumstances of our making, the pot owes a debt of gratitude to the potter. Later one will learn that an earthen vessel can hold a treasure as well as any other. But let ever son of Adam and daughter of Eve pay respect to the parents that gave them life, no matter how far they themselves have fallen.
Second, we are made in their image. They have given us their strengths as well as their weaknesses. We have the smile of one and the laugh of the other. Each of us is an amalgamation of our parents and grandparents as we are a miracle of God. If we have inherited a handicap it is only in order to afford us the opportunity to see what great things God can do with a little. If we have inherited strengths it is only to equip us for some ministry, for we know that "unto whom much is given, much is required."
Thirdly, they showed us care although we were unconscious of it when our world was a cradle. They fed us when we were hungry, and washed us when necessary. They held us close when frightened by the thunder, or when we were afraid of the dark. They met our every need, and protected us when we could do nothing to protect ourselves. They sang a lullaby for us in the night. We were truly dependants during those first years. The better our parents, the more they taught us, disciplined, and directed us. The best of them prayed for us and took us early to the house of God. But even if we had to find the house of God by ourselves, when we got there we should have bowed our heads and thanked God for our parents. Whoever or whatever our parents were, they deserve the respect that is theirs according to the commandment.
The best of parents reflected the image of God. And when Jesus searched for the perfect word to describe the invisible God obscured behind the clouds of the spirit world he reached for a familiar word that brings a look of understanding to the eyes of all who want to see. That word, of course was "Father." He gave us life, made us in his image, and cares for us.
Sad is the breaker of the fifth commandment. There is no justification for doing so. There is no excuse for violating such a simple law. Honor thy mother and father. We honor and respect them when we listen, love, and learn from them. It is only in the animal world where the curse of sin has no nobility of the human soul that the parents harm their young. But even this is against nature, and the exception rather than the rule. Respect is the spiknard and precious ointment that should be poured out from the alabaster box of appreciation to our parents.
To those who feel the guilt of breaking this commandment and shall in this life find no more opportunity to rectify wrongs committed, or seek parental forgiveness, we can only say that "all have sinned and fallen short of the glory of God." There is forgiveness for every sin in Christ. And if we can no longer honor the living, let us at least honor the dead.
When we grow out of childhood and become parents ourselves we may discover for ourselves the pain of disobedient children, or even the sting of ingratitude. Perhaps the one who has perfect children shall escape reaping the fruits from seeds that he has sown, but I doubt it.
The parent who abdicates his authority and would rather be a play mate does little to prepare their children for survival in this world. Children need someone to warm them, but also to warn them. They need parents who keep the first commandment if they expect their children to keep the fifth. They need parents who believe in the absolute authority of God's word and live as if it is first as well as final. They need parents who set up worthy goals and coach each child to find and discover God's will. Children need parents that live up to their family name, and to that "name which is above every name." Children need parents who understand that man is a clock and an eternal time piece that must be wound once every seven days. Children need parents that know and love God and understand their chief aim in life is to glorify Christ forever.
Parents perform a ministry of grace that may afford the opportunity for reciprocation. When parents become aged and infirm they may find themselves the ones who need to be cared for. Should that day come, remember the fifth commandment. Each must determine before God what that means, and it is not for us to judge another. One will breathe his last with family around the bed at home, another will be surrounded with medical equipment and stainless steel. The command of God is that our parents be afforded the love, care, respect, and dignity they deserve while it is in our power to do so, and then with every memory, may we honor them.
Honor is earned and respect is learned. Some have ill learned respect because of a poor teacher. The parent is the teacher. The best lessons are found in an example. Respect needs a model. The best way for a parent to teach respect is to give it. When the parent keeps the first four commandments his example will be brilliant. When the parent remembers the every child is a miracle and a gift from heaven he will handle it is a holy thing. When a parent realizes that each child is body, soul, and spirit they will be careful not to defile, mistreat, or abuse one who was made in the image of God. When a parent remembers that "all have sinned and come short of the glory of God " they will not neglect to discipline and correct, and exhort with all longsuffering. When a parent remembers that even the most beautiful child is broken and has a sinful nature he will not be tempted to worship the creature more than the creator. When a parent realizes that a child actually belongs to God and is simply placed in his care for a few years, he will not neglect so important a ministry.
If we believe God is God, then we realize that God has the right to make the rules. Remember the illustration of playing without goals? Think about playing without rules. It would be chaos- it would not be fun. Everyone would cheat.
Sin is breaking God's rules. When you play baseball- you must decide where to put the bases. Where are the foul lines. What is a home run? How many strikes until you are out? How many balls in a walk? What if the pitcher hits the batter with a pitch? It is all in the rules.
How do we know someone has become a Christian? How do we know someone has become "Born Again?" They come to realize that God makes the rules. They recognize that God is the Authority in their life. (Rom. 10:9-10; Lk. 7:8; Lk. 6:47;Mal. 1:6). Moses came to Pharaoh with God's word. Pharaoh's response was the response of an unbeliever. "Who is the LORD, that I should obey him?" (Ex. 5:1-1). You see, real faith recognizes God's right to make the rules.
"Obedience is the very best way to show that you believe." Our old nature does not like being told what to do. Many times we don't like the rules. We need to determine that we love God enough to obey- even when we don't understand the reason behind the rule.
Eph. 6:1 "Children obey your parents in the Lord, for this is right."
The fifth Commandment is about Honor. The Conviction has to do with Respect. When a person trusts God, He is willing to come under God's authority, like a protective umbrella. To rebel is to come out from beneath God's protective care. Such rebellion is akin to witchcraft (1 Sam. 15:23).
The curriculum of kindness, administered with a gentle firmness, is the best academy of learning. The golden rule, and the law of love will cause the parent to listen as much as lecture. It will be sensitive enough to train the stubborn will without crushing the spirit. Respect from the parent will breed respect from the child. Grace begets grace. Lessons of respect will not allow rebellion, for it is as the sin of witchcraft. The fifth commandment introduces every child to the lawful rights of authority. Those who fail to learn respect for authority in the home may have to one day learn it the hard way. The parent who permits disrespect in the home will one day regret it in the street. Lessons of respect will insist it appreciate that every person has dignity and parents a place of special honor. Respect will learn to laugh, but more at one's self than at others. Respect will recognize the property rights of others, as well as their privacy, and their opinions. Respect, when learned will forge a medal of honor that is as blessed to give as to receive.
For Class Discussion
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